Also today.. I saw this book in Target.. (while I was waiting FOREVER). Its called You are My Wish Come True by Marianne Richmond Its SO adorable.. The mommy bear is telling the baby bear how she wished for him before she was pregnant and when she was pregnant.. And i started crying in Target. I almost bought the book, but then I remembered my strict no-buying-books in the store policy.. and good thing too, cuz its $5 cheaper on Amazon. I will definitely be buying it for baby.As far as other books go.. I finished Gone, Baby, Gone.. It was actually really similar to the movie.. The only real difference were small details/minor characters.. So.. I liked it.. It took me a while to read.. but it was definitely worth it. I then started to read a Miscarriage grief book called I Never Held You. I actually think I'm not going to keep reading it.. Why? Because reading it made me realize.. I REALLY HAVE MOVED ON!!! Sure there are still days when I miss my two angel babies.. or wish that I was 7 months pregnant instead of one. But.. like the book said.. you know when you have moved on when your life becomes some sort of happy again.. And really..I am happy.. Even before I got pregnant again... sure I had some jealousy.. But it had been a long time since I was really a mess about the whole miscarriage thing.. I do realize there is more to my life than my losses!
And something happened the other day that I don't want to go into the details about here.. but lets just say I felt REALLY bad for some of the angry and jealous feelings I had during and shortly after my last miscarriage.. It really put things into perspective, and I realize I don't ever want to feel that way again.. I wanted to be pregnant, but I never in a thousand years would wish pain on someone else.. I don't want to see ANYONE go through infertility or loss.. So I am sorry if I ever was jealous or angry because anyone else was pregnant. It was a mistake. Actually, MaydayGirl recently wrote a post about grace.. and how she felt she lacked grace and that is exactly how I feel too about this whole situation.. I'm sorry. :(
3 comments:
Ahh!! I just got back from vacation and had a feeling I should check your blog. Congrats!!! I'm so happy for you! You so deserve this. Good luck and if you need anything let me know!
Glad the injection wasn't too bad! I might check out that book, it looks so cute..the baby book. The m/c book also looks interesting, I'll have to check that out. I'm glad you are doing so well. ♥
awwww, I am so proud of you for the shots. I know that was hard but hey, you give me hope for when my times come. I love that book idea. I won't get it now but it seems like a sweet book. Keep your chin up, you are making it work and this is your time.
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